Saturday, January 1, 2011

Bring on 2011

To re-cap...we talked to our RE on Wed morning (12/22) when he called to let us know the results of the last egg.  I have been doing lots of reading the past few months on egg and sperm quality.  Tests for sperm are better as they rate sperm by morphology and motility but still there is not full proof way....well, same for eggs.  They rate them by appearance (or as our RE said, "it's a beauty contest") and I obviously didn't win.  Of the 4 eggs - 3 were mature - 2 were rated "poor" and 1 "fair".  He said but even with those ratings, it doesn't mean that they won't fertilize.  He said there is just no way to tell.  Also, he assured us that this doesn't mean that IVF won't work.  He said we should cycle again and they will increase my meds and see what happens.  He thinks we should treat this as a fluke and move forward.  Ugh - easier said than done, right?

Anyway, he was nothing but kind and patient with our questions and thoughts.  I guess, I feel like the bottom line is we have crappy eggs and crappy sperm.  I will be digging deep this next month to continue to find motivation and desire to keep pushing through.  Last week was rough.  This week was better.  In my mind, I know it will be easier with time.  But my heart still hurts and the wound is still fresh.

As a good friend said today, "New Year - New Hope and Possibilities" ~ oh, how right she is.  Although not all of 2010 was terrible, I am ready for a fresh start, for sure.  Bring on 2011 ~ Happy New Year!


  1. I'm so sorry about how things have turned out. I believe there is still hope for you! I will keep you in my thoughts. I hope 2011 is a much better year for you!

  2. I am just catching up and am so so sorry to see how your cycle turned out!! Oh so freaking sorry. I wish I had better words aside from expletives for you.

    Be gentle with yourself and take some time to regroup. Hoping 2011 brings that renewed sense of hope. Many hugs...

  3. Quick response. Same office, different first IVF I did horribly on the meds. Horribly. I think we got 3 eggs. Fast forward, I would be on the lowest doses possible and get at least 20 eggs. So, sometimes it is just a bad cycle. They don't have you on the flare cycle, right?