Wednesday, January 4, 2012


That's how I feel about Friday's ultrasound. It sucks. I'm trying to be in the moment but quite frankly, I can't. I won't what if either because where's that going to get me? More apprehension and nervousness. Ugh. Bad week for my acupuncturist to be on vacay!

And to add to my already emotional state, I think I hurt my mom's feelings tonight. She asked what time my u/s is on Friday and I told her 10a. She proceeded to say that she was thinking about coming up for it. I paused and said I had thought about that too but hadn't mentioned it to DH yet. I said, I didnt know, I'm just really guarded about this because it could be bad. She replied with, that's ok, I won't. We kinda talked over each other with me saying, no, let me think about it and her saying its ok. I finally said, do you have the day off? And she said no, but I was going to take the day. Ugh. So when I get home, I mentioned it to DH who thinks its weird and agrees, what if its not good news?

I hate hurting her feelings and I feel like I did. I hate this feeling, like I've let her down because God knows she's been our biggest cheerleader. I asked DH about it again a few minutes ago and he doesn't care either way but I don't know if I should just leave it be or ask her...why is everything so complicated?

I cannot wait for Friday to be over so we have more info about what our future holds.


  1. Long time no comment, but first, Huge congrats on the BFP!! I'm sorry you are feeling nervous, par for the course. I think your betas look good! As far as having your mom there, I think you need to do whatever feels right to you & DH. Your mom will understand either way & no matter what news you get at the u/s she will still be one of your biggest supporters whether she comes up or not. Good luck!!

  2. I am sure your mom will understand this is something you and DH want to experience with each other. I hope all goes well on your u/s tomorow. Keeping my fingers crossed for you :)

  3. just breathe. how will an ounce of anxiety change the outcome? I'm not minimizing you, just trying to see the journey from here in texas


  4. Praying and keeping everything crossed for you guys.